Finding the true me again

[Cicley Lee]

Hello I’m Lee! I really need help with finding the real me again. I was the only black girl in my school and people made fun of my hair for being frizzy and wild and I just didnt fit in. In high school I changed me I started to dye my hair light brown, relaxed it and straightened it everyday and i did everything to lighten my skin to fit in. I look back and I miss my curly crazy hair and olive skin. I wanna be who I was born to be but everyone sees me as white now. I wanna go get my tan back but i dont want people to freak out and start calling me names. Also I have no clue how to handle me hair and I’ve gone to stylist and they have tried but my hair is confused some wants to be straight and other parts its curl. Please I need help and advice. Thank you for listening!!

[Shannon Louis]

Wow! This is huge! I will like to know if anyone here can help you with the right information.

[Cicley Lee]

Thank you so much! I’m so nervous about talking about all this.

[Shannon Louis]

You welcome. I don’t think you should. My people have a saying, he who share his/her burden has begun the first step to solving it. So I hope you get the answers to your questions.

[shilon85]

Cicley I am especially glad that you would like to go back to the original you as you said. I think personally nothing beats being your true self. This way you don’t have to constantly keep thinking of how to behave, how to look or speak.

I would like to give you suggestions but also could you please answer some questions for me so I can see how else I can help.

1. What country and state do you live in?
2. Are you now in secondary school or university?

If you can please answer these questions, I will see how else I can find better info for you. In the meantime, here are my suggestions.

 

1. Not like you need to but if you think it’s important to let your close friends know about your root so they aren’t shocked when they see changes in you, have a discussion with them about it. Don’t hold back, be honest and tell them about the changes to come and to be expected. For those who are truly your friends will understand. My guess is you don’t need to have this conversation with your family as they already know you.
2. About your hair: You need to go to a hair stylist that specializes in your hair type.  This way he/she helps you with it and also teaches you how to deal with it. If you aren’t sure where to start, google natural afro hair specialist in your area or use hastags to find them on IG, twitter or facebook
3. About your skin: This should be the easy one. Stay away from the skin lightening cream and use creams that naturally moisturizes and glows your skin e.g. cocoa butter, shea butter etc.

I pray and hope you find your true self again and you are happy with it cos there isn’t a better feeling in the world than the feeling of being your true self. Stay strong, believe in yourself because you are amazing and beautiful and don’t let anyone tell you any different. Also, don’t forget you always have the support of this community and you can connect with us anytime. we are here for you. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[Nnenna]

Forget about people, they are going to call you names regardless. The most important thing is to decide to be true to yourself first with unwavering determination, when they see that, they will respect you for the same.

Start again. Stop lightening your skin and start using essential oils and butters to repair it. Take lots of Vit C too. Then cut your hair, all of it. Start again. Start with the new year. You’ll feel great at the end of the year. Goodluck on your journey!

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